All Poetry

A Search Within.

How do I know
the pill won’t seem
bitter to your tongue
through your teeth?

How do I wear
a once white coat
stained with tears
of memories?

How do I compel
my pen to write
scripts to fight
a dimming light?

How do I know
 which waters will flow
to unearth the strength
within me?

How do I persuade
a heart to let go
when it’s my hand
that sets you free?

How do I ensure
my smile won’t be
one of the last
that you’ll see?

How do I force
my ears to hear
a song I fear
of dusk so near?

How do I know
which waters will come
to enshroud the doubts
within me?

92 replies »

  1. A lovely thought provoking poem, but is based on self-doubt. How do you know all those things? For most of them you don’t but isn’t that a beauty of living? We are constantly confronted with scenarios over which we have little, if any, control. Will you agree with my thoughts here? I don’t know but at least I have an opportunity to express them and possibly cause more thoughts on the subject. Will anybody comment back? I don’t know but I provided an opportunity if they so desire.

    If the pill is bitter on their tongue, it may well be a small price to pay for the benefits. Will they forgive you for giving them a bitter pill? I don’t know, but I suspect that they will. 🙂

    • Hi Colin. 🙂 You bring up some very good points, and I do agree with your thoughts. I’ll admit, however, that there is always a constant lingering self-doubt within with each move I make as a caregiver… “Am I doing what is best for my patients? What else can I do for them? What if there IS something else that can be done…?” Questions like these keep me up at night thinking about the sicker patients…but maybe eventually I’ll find an inner peace…?

      Best wishes to you and Ray 😀

      • They are all understandable questions but the answers are your guide. “Are you doing what is best for your patients?” Only you can answer that but, short of encouraging divine intervention, I would suspect that you are doing everything you can. Even the simple concept of perhaps taking time off to further study treatments poses the question “What will happen to my patients while I am away?” The question “What if there is more that I can do?” poses the obvious question “Such as?”. Having no doubt that you cannot answer, that really confirms that you are doing everything possible … today. Tomorrow there may be a medical revelation, but today is what you have to work with. Be at peace knowing that if it were not for your compassion, sensitivity, and knowledge….. those people in ICU would have another doctor who may perhaps be less tuned in to their circumstances.

  2. How do you know? Because YOU are there – exactly where you are meant to be – for a reason – because you are you – precisely needed!… Great poem!

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